Have I lost my mind? You betcha!
I was fooling around and came up with some Valentine’s Day Rhymes that humorously describe my four cats. Something nonsense able, but fun. So take it for what it’s worth, poking harmless fun at myself and my funny, quirky, cats, Monkie, Butta, Fat Albert aka Licky Kitty and Nibbler. I hope you have a good laugh and if so, Happy Valentine’s Day!
How to Train Your Cat Human
Budda, Nibbler, Monkie, Fat Albert aka Licky Kitty
“Licky Kitty”
His scratchy tongue licks my hand
Rhythmic purrs sooth my nerves.
I call him “Licky Kitty.”
He’s black and sleek and soft and sweet
And eats and sleeps all day.
But when awake he comes around
He rubs against my leg.
And when I go away;
He sits outside my door
He’ll cry and whine with toy in mouth
To see me once again.
I pick him up and like a friend I talk to him;
I know he understands.
Back and forth his tail will wag
He looks me in the eye.
I set him down, he walks away
My heart begins to melt.
But then I see his stare at me
Impatiently he waits.
He’s at his feeding bowl
You see it’s time for him to dine.
Conned again, oh what a pity;
He’s not my perfect Valentine
Just hungry, “Licky Kitty”.
“Butta” (But-ta) Not “Buddha”
It’s “Butta”
Not “Buddha”, we say.
It’s mispronounced
Every which way.
It’s “Butta”, not “Booda”, we say.
They can’t seem to say it that way.
It’s “Butta”, not “Booda”, we say.
Can one day they say it that way?
He’s called “Butta”, like But-ta we say.
You ask why do we call him that way?
Cause he melts in your arms, we say;
Just as butta on bread that you’d spread.
Our “Butta” looks very well fed.
From his tail to his very big head.
Seek the tiniest box you can find;
That’s where he will stuff his behind.
And if you should walk by a chair;
From under the seat,
His big paw will swipe at your feet.
He’s soft and he’s round, our own tubby clown.
Who turns every frown upside down.
He’s funny and sweet;
And nowhere petite.
But he makes every day;
A Valentine’s Day
Cause he’s “Butta” and special that way.
He’s “Butta”, our “Butta”, we say.
“HE NEVER STOPS AT NO!”
Grey and white he’s small in height
But large of heart;
He’s not afraid, he shows no fright
His tail puffs out
And off He darts;
He never stops at No!
He tackles cats at twice his size;
So play with him or Run!
And if they run, he’ll chase them down
To wrestle to the ground because;
He never stops at No!
Thank God he sleeps so sound.
And that’s the time the rest of us
Can finally settle down.
When Nibbler’s up
He’s never bored;
He never stops at No!
He’s in your face and not to be ignored.
Sit in a chair he’s on the back;
Stand on the floor, he’s at your feet
You have to watch your step;
Or tumble to the floor.
Don’t bend or stoop;
Cause just like that he rides your back;
The King of his domain.
And all the while he steady chats;
We wonder if he’s sane.
He eats and eats and begs for more.
To keep him fed’s a constant chore;
He’s always wanting more.
And when he’s fed;
He’s got more fuel to chase one of the cats.
But as the day draws to an end
I find that every now and then
And once in a great while.
My day will end with me
As a, forgotten Valentine.
But then I get a hearty lick;
A Purr, a look;
That’s when I smile;
I know I’m not forsook.
It’s not a human but a cat
Who doesn’t care or know.
I pick him up from where he sat;
No more do I feel low.
It’s just another day to him.
Another day alive;
Another day to thrive.
Another day spent with a cat
Who never stops at No!
“Scaredy Cat”
On Valentine’s a gift arrives;
A vase of roses just for me.
Monkie, my cat’s a scaredy cat
At any noise or sound.
A rose leaf flutters to the floor;
And there he goes, he’s out the door.
He rounds the bend, he jumps the couch;
He’s in the wind, and doesn’t stop.
The windows near, he hops the sill;
A blur of motion, and off again.
Atop the chair, and down the arm;
A tip of tail is all I see.
A puff of air, where could he be?
I check the closet, no not there.
I cannot see him anywhere.
His moves are fast and stealth.
I look, No he’s not on the bed, or shelf;
Nor on the dresser top.
I see at last he’s in the drawer;
Relaxed he purrs and licks his fur.
I take a breath and wipe my brow;
The tissue falls and hits the floor.
It startles him, and off he goes;
Back down the hall and out the door.
The table’s in the way.
As he runs past, no time to pray
My vase of roses hits the floor;
My jaw drops there as well.
Roses, leaves and broken glass
And water where it fell.
Monkie looks back and wags his tail;
I try to look away.
With mop and broom and pail;
I clean, as far as can be seen;
One rose survives the fray.
I tell myself, I love my cat I say.
I hold my rose and walk away
And step upon some glass.
I drop the rose and off he goes
Again he’s hauling ass.
I won’t repeat the words I say
This busted, Valentine’s Day.
Thank You,
In order of appearance, Fat Albert aka Licky Kitty, Butta, Nibbler and Scaredy Cat aka Monkie.
Sandra Moses, ashes2essenz.com